‘Tis Only an Aul Wink

It is true for Tomsey Burke, he never missed a good funeral, telling all and sundry that life was ‘only an aul wink, that’s what it is’.  

Everyone agreed with him and sure he loved the attention. Not understanding what he was saying only that he had heard Fr. Malone saying it at mass and everyone had talked about it in ‘Blondes’ afterwards.  

‘Blondes’ public house had Clarke’s over the door but nobody called it that because Ma Clarke’s offspring were all pure blonde. That was ok for the locals until they told a visitor to go to ‘Blondes’ of a Thursday for the music and sure they would walk the town trying to find ‘Blondes’ over the door, missing the music that the locals told them was a must. 

It has to be one of life’s greatest gifts to say that your life passed in an ‘aul wink’. Would Brigid and Kate have said that their life passed them by in an ‘aul wink’, a life spent counting the moments. Filled only with the stories they told themselves from the cracks in the ceilings that they stared at. Endless wakeful, melancholic moments, tormented with no one to tell their deepest darkest fears. Who would have understood, what words would they have used, who would have listened.  

Fortunately, able to read, the tick box question on the admission ledger, ‘Filthy or Clean’. Their right to question taken from them the moment they were pushed through the doors. The sameness, the pace of their thoughts before the fear would take hold and cripple them into a ball of sweat and tears. Allowing the liquid from their eyes drip onto the plastic of the pillow which trickled to the plastic of the sheet which remained until it seeped into their being. Like clockwork, they could rely upon the fear and the frenzy that followed.  

Did the life of Ben, James or Thomas pass in an ‘aul wink’. Were they embroiled in the pain as next of kin, embittered by proxy. Did they have moments of joy before they remembered, a guilt that it had passed them by. Were they riddled with the fear of being next. Did it matter that they were in different lands, as they put the key into the door of their stores of a morning. Did they take comfort in their fate or allow it to cripple them.  

Who were the lucky ones?

Life, mostly stood still for Brigid and Kate. Who could deny them wanting it to end, only those that knew no different. 

The envy of the luxury of your life passing you by in an aul wink.